Continued from the last week:
Stepping into the unknown is a scary thing. Sometimes the unknown is thrust on you and sometimes you make a decision to take that step. Either way, it can be like jumping off a cliff. When I said “yes” to this 20 hour a week receptionist job it felt like I was jumping into the unknown. I was veering off my familiar path and taking a left turn away for my comfortable yet seemingly boring life. Little did I know this step would answer my prayer of the last five years; “that I would find my identity in this new season of life”.
After about three weeks on the job I knew it wasn’t for me. It added more stress (for a variety of reasons) instead of relieving stress. During this time I also agreed to let my friend Joanne walk me through a prayer journey called Sozo. That hour and a half began to wipe away the fog and clouds that had kept me from seeing my way through this forrest of change. I forgave people close to me, closed doors against destructive thoughts and tore down walls I had built. After this journey the Lord showed me some beautiful things. MY CALLING IN LIFE IS STILL THE SAME. HE LOVES ME AND BELIEVES IN ME MORE THAN I CAN IMAGINE. TRUSTING HIM AND BELIEVING HE IS WANTING THE BEST FOR ME SHOULD BE MY MAIN FOCUS IN THIS SEASON.
Relief and peace began to minister to me. After working for six weeks I gave my notice and I will be finished at the end of May. I had walked through an open door that led me to realize I already had everything I needed in my life and all I needed to do was open my eyes to see what God saw.
All the change in my life had brought confusion and uncertainty. It took me time and trying different things to get to a place of understanding and seeing the real me again. Why had I been so blind to what was already there? I think a lot of it had to do with actually realizing it is ok to enjoy my life as it is and that just being me and who God made meis the most importantthing I can BE.
You would think I would be disappointed this job didn’t work out but instead, this experience has given me back my confidence and courage to explore other avenues of opportunity. There are many things I want to get better at and also to try for the first time. Anything that enlarges you is significant and worth trying, even Kayaking (me and my sister-in-law Renae).
Thanks Joanne for standing with me in prayer. Thanks to my David sisters-in-law for your support. A big thanks to my friend Linda for helping me talk through my thoughts in those long phone conversations. Also, a big thank you to my husband for putting up with me during this confusing time! During this season of change we need our friends and family and Jesus. I am thankful for all!!
I’ve learned so much and plan to keep learning and sharing how to navigate through these years of change. I can assure you, your next challenge is just around the corner!